W GREEK AMeERICAdN dings - The National Herald · melomakarona, kourabiedes, karidopita, and...

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E NATIONAL HERA

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GREEK AMERICAN

WeddingsMARCH 7, 2015

Greek American Weddings2 THE NATIONAL HERALD, MARCH 7, 2015

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By Margarita Kallas-Smithe

If you’re Greek, chances areyou’ve been to one of these.They usually consist of a lovely(long-lasting) church service fol-lowed by a generous dinner re-ception, socializing, intensedancing, and a seemingly nev-erending sweets table. I love agood sweets table. You knowwhich one I’m talking about –the one with a just right equilib-rium of both generic pastry shopsweets (those square-shaped as-sorted mini cakes and brownies)and quality homemade stuff youtake home with you for yourmorning coffee (diples, baklava,melomakarona, kourabiedes,karidopita, and kommatia).

Is it any wonder why non-Greeks are mesmerized by theirfirst Greek-American weddingexperience? It’s because theyhave truly never seen anythinglike a Greek party before. Ofcourse, it all depends on who isthrowing it, but generally speak-ing, we Greek-Americans knowhow to celebrate a wedding witha fabulous party. Besides, it’swhat most Greek-American girlsdream of their whole life,whether they want to admit itor not.

Let’s take a moment to thinkof all the great things that makea Greek-American wedding re-ception what it is. After church,guests speedily make their wayto the Greek banquet designatedon the invitation card they re-ceived months in advance. Theyhuddle over the table numbertable trying to locate their card.Once inside, they claim theirseat, hit the open bar, and scanthe room for those costumedwaiters zooming around holdingtrays filled with all sorts of horsd’oeuvres. You know you have afavorite. Banquets usually servefried mushrooms, mini chickenkebobs, tiropites, and spanako-pites.

With a drink hand, the oldergeneration starts to babble withold friends and business ac-quaintances, asking each otherhow the family business is going,which table they are seated at,and if their kids have found any-one to marry yet. (Proksenioplans abound at Greek-Americanweddings.)

Finally, the time comes towelcome the newlyweds. (Oh,right…we’re here to celebrate

their big day! Almost forgot withall the talk and food beingpassed around.) So everyone(sometimes reluctantly) quietsdown for the big entrance. It’sstandard that some men are stilltalking business, while somewomen comment on the center-piece wondering who will takeit home.

The DJ (usually the same oneat every Greek-American wed-ding you’ve been to) plays anawkward mix of American popmusic to welcome in the bridalparty. You’re thinking - “Arethose bridesmaids really goingto wear that dress again?” Withthat pea green, coral, dark silveror maroon color – probably not.You take a look around and yes,most everyone is wearing black.Except for those rebels and thebride’s and groom’s mothers.These petheres are sportingsome color of choice of that clas-sic two-piece ensemble full ofbeads, equipped with a match-ing shawl, of course.

One of the groomsmen isbound to be shorter than his ac-companying bridesmaid. Thering boy and flower girl are soshy it’s cute. Equally as cute areany grandparents still around towitness this joyous day for theirgrandchildren. We all love a yi-

ayia and pappou smiling as theystride proudly to the crowd’spraise. It’s always really strangeto watch them walk to the beatof hip hop or pop music the DJhas chosen to play, but we allsoon get over it. And finally, ac-companied by some even moreobnoxious tune, enter the brideand groom. Guests amp their ap-plause and everyone takes theirseat.

The room goes dark and(lately, very popular) a photocompilation video begins to playrevealing embarrassing imagesof the groom in diapers and acnein high school. According to pho-

tographic evidence, the bridewent on more interesting familytrips and vacations, and had lessembarrassing moments. Thenewlyweds’ parents and grand-parents are younger in thisslideshow and everyone thinksto themselves how quickly theyears have gone by. The room isfilled with “awwws,” and just asthe film begins to bring tears topeople’s eyes, it ends.

Moving on to the next chap-ter, the priest of honor leadseveryone with a prayer, and nota second later, butter is beingwhipped hastily onto those minibreads passed around in a bas-

ket. You’re eyeing your favoriteone, hoping theia Toula won’tsnatch it. (It’s the last one!)

Waiters resume their post andthe clanking of dinnerware fillsthe air as members of the bridalparty acquire the microphoneone after the other. The fatherof the bride pulls out an essayhe’s written for his daughter’sspecial day. The older unwedsibling begins to sob as they telleveryone how happy they arefor their happily wed youngersibling, (knowing that interro-gation by curious theies will bein effect the entire night.) Youwonder if anyone is really lis-tening when the koumbaroi aretalking. It’s the groom’s turn sohe has to officially and in publicstate how beautiful his wife isand how she didn’t pay attentionto him the first time they met,or how he was afraid of beingturned down by her father whenthey were dating. Standard.

At that point, the soup hasbeen slurped up, and most of thetable is discussing how there wasor was not enough chicken inthat avgolemono. That observa-tion evolves into a discussion ofwhether the froth was goodenough, then someone is boundto calculate how much (depend-ing on the food served, the dé-cor, and if there is a live bandplaying) the wedding must havecost the bride’s father.

After a refreshing salad usu-ally comes the not so well-donefillet mignon drizzled in thatmouthwatering brown sauce, aside of shrimp, and steamed veg-etables.

Then someone at some dis-tant table starts clanking silver-ware against their coffee cup.Others join in and the echoingsound doesn’t stop until thebride and groom have kissed.This is repeated several timesthroughout the dinner.

After the wedding cake is cutwith a number of photographersand a video crew capturing themoment from a number of an-gles, the cake is zoomed off tothe kitchen for slicing. You don’tusually see those (some may de-scribe as tacky) cakes toppedwith bridges and plastic bride,groom, and bridal party fig-urines anymore, but when youdo, you know some kid is boundto try and take one down.

Speaking of kids, (and therealways are kids at Greek-Ameri-can weddings) they will be run-

The Greek American Wedding: a Candid Reflection

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Greek American WeddingsTHE NATIONAL HERALD, MARCH 7, 2015 3

ning around wreaking havoc.You’ve seen the type, the super-hyper ones their parents cannotcontrol. They will request deco-rative balloons to be takendown, and they will crawl underthe tables and chase other kidsaround the dance floor. The onlything they will stand still for (fora moment) is the classic ice carv-ing (in the shape of swans) thatthey will eventually want totouch. These sweet little buggerswill be the ones trying to tripyou while you dance in circles,and the ones eventually (andthankfully) falling asleep ex-hausted on two combined chairstoward the end of the night.

Getting back to the bride andgroom, they share their firstdance to a song they relate to(but you know you’d choose abetter song if it was your wed-ding.) The bridal party entersthe scene. Their dancing timelasts excruciatingly long, asguests are just waiting to get upand join in on the lively Greekmusic. That moment finallycomes when the DJ announcesthe dance floor is open. People

swarm in from all sides and theparty is taken to the next level.

The Greek-American wed-ding dance floor is where every-one will join hands, try not toskip a beat, and get to examinewhat everyone else is wearing,all while avoiding looking oddin front of the traveling cameraman. It’s where we show ournon-Greek guests a good time asthey attempt to not trip overthemselves with all our compli-cated dance moves. Someone isbound to get stepped on (orpierced) by someone else’s heel.At some point, the dance floorseems to shrink and you have topay close attention as to notsprain an ankle when you crossthe line from wood to carpetcovered floor.

We all love those classic wed-ding songs and upbeat islandtunes, but some of us live forthat serious tsamiko. After abrief break featuring the latestAmerican pop music with a mixof 80s and Michael Jackson,Greek music resumes, and thistime, some guests have thrownoff their shoes to go barefoot.

Dollars are thrown left and right.Kids scramble to pick up asmany as they can only to be toldby parents that they cannot keepthem.

The bride and groom maketheir rounds at each table toshare their gratitude, and it’s amiracle they are still standingafter so many hours.

Then there’s another musicbreak. It’s time for all the singleladies to pile up on the dancefloor. That way, all the grand-mothers and theies can spot whois still available for that one“good Greek boy” they haveheard exists…somewhere outthere. The bride throws back herbouquet and there’s a “friendly”fight between two or morewomen just dying to snatch that“next-in-line” title. And after therest of the girls have been leftempty handed while the titlewinner looks like she just wonthe Miss Universe Pageant, sud-denly, that one song plays thatsignifies the sweet table is offi-cially open (though a couple in-patient theies have already se-cretly accessed it.) We all knowthe sweet table line can beavoided by cutting, and peopleare already looking left and rightfor those white Styrofoam boxes.It’s only expected that after somuch food there is little spacefor sweets, so it’s understandablethese will be enjoyed at homethe day after the wedding, andmaybe for a couple days afterthat (depending on quantity.)That’s why you try to jam asmany sweets Tetris-style intoone (or two) container(s.) Yousimply must satisfy your sweettooth, but you don’t want to bethe one seen carrying the lean-ing tower of Styrofoam on yourway out. Besides, you have tobalance that with the take-homecenterpiece, and the baggedwedding cake slices.

But the party is not over yet.Zeibekiko has just started anduncle Louie is making a scene.And in case by that time yourstomach is starting to feel a littleempty, late-night finger foodemerges to save the day. Themoney-sweeping brooms comeout, someone has broken a plate,and it’s finally time to go home.

A great Greek-American wed-ding concludes with a full stom-ach, several proksenio attempts,take-home boubounieres filledwith koufeta, and a pair of su-per-tired feet! It’s safe to say thatGreek-American weddings makefor some of the liveliest andmost enjoyable experiences forall. I’m most definitely lookingforward to my next one.

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By Anna Skamangas-Scaros

When I was young and hadthe thrill of finding a weddinginvitation in the mail that said“and Family,” I couldn’t containmy excitement about attendingthe occasion. I couldn’t wait tosee the bride’s gown, the colorof the bridesmaid’s dresses, theflowers in the bouquet, and thebest part – the reception!

In those days, you didn’thave options of a main dish.There was one entrée, with thesame sides for everyone, andwhite cake with white icing fordessert. The wedding receptionin particular is also subject tocultural differences, both ethnicand geographical. I rememberattending my first Greek wed-ding in New York as a younggirl. The cocktail hour had morefood than dinner and was ex-tremely lavish. On the otherhand, I remember attending awedding in the deep south as ateenager where Chick fil-A wasserved at the rehearsal dinnerand the reception was a covereddish dinner.

Over time, weddings haveevolved quite a bit. The bride isno longer bound to white or offwhite as a gown color choice(although this is still a bit scan-dalous in some parts of thecountry), and people are mak-ing all kinds of different choices

for the reception. Following arethe current food trends for wed-dings and recipes to go alongwith them. Enjoy!

Serving Breakfast forDinner

Many couples are opting forearlier services with a brunch tofollow or serving breakfast foodfor dinner. Weddings are expen-sive and breakfast food is muchcheaper than prime rib or grilledtilapia. Not to mention that youcan almost have your pick of adate when you get married ear-

lier in the day. Typically, thebreakfast foods that are servedare traditional fare with agourmet twist.

Banana PecanPancakesServes 6Ingredients:2 cups buttermilk3 eggs1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanillaextract2 cups all-purpose flour1 1/2 teaspoons bakingpowder

1 teaspoon baking soda1 pinch salt4 tablespoons evaporatedsugar cane juice1/2 cup pecans, finely chopped1/2 stick butter, melted3 bananas, peeled and slicedReal maple syrupDirections:

Preheat the oven to 200 de-grees F.

In a large mixing bowl whiskthe buttermilk, eggs, and vanillatogether so they are well com-bined. In a separate bowl mixthe flour, baking powder, soda,salt, and evaporated sugar canejuice. Combine the wet ingredi-ents with the dry and stir untilcombined. Fold in the pecans,most of the melted butter andwhisk until smooth.

Heat a griddle or skillet overmedium low heat and coat withmelted butter. Using a ladle orempty ketchup bottle, pour thebatter into the pan.

Cook the pancakes on 1 sideuntil small bubbles rise to thetop. Lightly press the bananasinto the batter. Flip the pan-cakes and cook until golden onboth sides. Transfer pancakes toa warming plate in the ovenwhile you make the rest.

Serve with maple syrup totaste.

The Food Bar

More and more caterers areoffering different types of foodbars like, guacamole bars, pizzabars, pasta bars, and more dur-ing cocktail hour, where a chefmuddles and mixes in front ofyour guests. This is lots of funand also passes the time whilethe couple has pictures taken.

Guacamole withToasted Pita ChipsServes 8-10Ingredients:2 ripe avocados1/2 teaspoon sea salt1 tablespoon of fresh lime juice2 tablespoons thinly slicedscallions1-2 jalapeno peppers, seededand finely chopped2 tablespoons cilantro (leavesand tender stems), finelychopped (optional)A dash of freshly grated blackpepper1/2 ripe tomato, seeds andpulp removed, choppedToasted pita chipsDirections:

Cut the avocados in half. Re-move seed. Scoop out avocadofrom the peel and place in amixing bowl.

Using a fork, roughly mashthe avocado. Sprinkle with saltand lime (or lemon) juice. Addthe chopped onion, cilantro,black pepper, and jalapeno pep-per.

Place plastic wrap on the sur-face of the guacamole cover itand to prevent air reaching it.Refrigerate until ready to serve.Add the tomato just before serv-ing.

Serve with toasted pita chips.

Food Trucks

Yes, you read that correctly!Food trucks are very popular inlarger cities where you can get

great food. This also appeals tothose hosting an outdoor wed-ding because the food truck cancome directly to your location.

Falafel in Pita withTzatziki SauceServes 4Ingredients:For Sauce6 ounces plain Greek yogurt1/2 cucumber, peeled, seeded,and grated1/3 cup chopped fresh dillSalt and pepper to tasteFor Falafel1 can Eden chickpeas, rinsedand drained1 small onion1/2 cup fresh parsley3 cloves garlic, chopped1 egg1 teaspoon ground cumin1 teaspoon sea salt1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper

1 teaspoon lemon juice1 teaspoon baking powder1 tablespoon olive oil1 cup dry bread crumbsGrape seed oil for frying2 pita breads cut in half1 cup chopped cherry tomatoesDirections:

In a small bowl combine yo-gurt, cucumber, dill, salt andpepper and mix well. Chill forat least 30 minutes.

In a large bowl mash chick-peas until thick and pasty. In afood processor, process onion,parsley and garlic until smooth.

Stir into mashed chickpeas.In a small bowl combine egg,

cumin, salt, cayenne, lemonjuice and baking powder. Stirinto chickpea mixture alongwith olive oil. Slowly add breadcrumbs until mixture is notsticky but will hold together.Add more bread crumbs asneeded. Form 8 balls and thenflatten into patties.

Heat 1 inch of oil in a largeskillet over medium-high heat.Fry patties in hot oil until brownon both sides. Serve two falafelsin each pita half topped withchopped tomatoes and tzatziki.

Comfort Food

Many cocktail hours areshowcasing favorite food of thehappy couple. Presentation iswhat makes this acceptable forsuch an occasion. So, you

wouldn’t serve fries in a BurgerKing bag, but maybe in a mono-gramed cone, instead.

Hand-Cut RosemaryGarlic Fries

Serves 4Ingredients:3 large russet potatoes, skins

on, washed, cut into 1 inch widestrips

3 cups of grape seed oil2 sprigs of fresh rosemary

(optional)


Wedding Food Trends

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2 cloves of garlic, minced(optional)

Sea salt and cracked pepperto taste

Directions:Add the fries to a large bowl

of cold water for about 20 min-utes. Drain fries on a towel toremove the moisture before fry-ing.

Add the oil to a medium-sized pot, along with one sprigof rosemary, and heat to 300 de-grees.

Remove the needles from theother sprig of rosemary. Finelychop it and mix it with the gar-lic. Set aside.

Remove the rosemary sprigfrom the oil. In small batches,add the fries and par cook themonly for about 5 minutes, untilgolden. Remove with a slottedspoon, and set them aside onsome paper towels. Repeat withremaining potatoes.

Bring the oil temperature upto 350 degrees. Add the parcooked potatoes in smallbatches, cooking for another 5-7 minutes, or until they aregolden brown and crispy. Drainon paper towels.

Add the fries to a mixingbowl, and generously seasonwith salt and pepper. Toss in therosemary and garlic paste, coat-ing the fries evenly.

Rustic Receptions

Many couples are going forthe rustic reception with familystyle meals served at buffet ta-bles instead of rounds.

Buffalo MeatloafServes 6-8Ingredients:1 pound ground bison1 pound ground pork2 beaten eggs1 tablespoon minced garlic2 teaspoons sea salt2 teaspoons dried oregano1/3 cup fresh parsley,

chopped1 tablespoon stone ground

mustard1/2 cup ketchup2 tablespoons Worcestershire

sauce11/2 cups bread crumbs4 tablespoons extra-virgin

olive oilDirections:Preheat the oven to 350 de-

grees F.Mix all ingredients together

in a bowl until thoroughly com-bined. Form into a loaf or placein a bread loaf pan.

Cover with aluminum foiland bake for 35 minutes, or un-til the meat thermometer regis-ters 165 degrees F.

Uncover and bake 10-15minutes more until the topbrowns.

Geographical CultureTaken Elsewhere

Traditionally, couples getmarried where the bride grewup. This is still largely the case,but couples may have been liv-ing somewhere else and wantto bring some of the cultural cui-sine from their other (or future)location.

Lobster RollsServes 6-8Ingredients:Meat from the claws, knuckles,and tail of two 1 1/4 poundcooked lobsters, cut into smallchunks with any cartilage andthe dark vein-like organ fromthe tail removed2 tablespoons mayonnaise 1 medium stalk of celery, finelydicedSea salt and pepper to taste6-8 New England-style hot dogrolls. (You can use regular hotdog buns if you can’t findthese)2 - 4 tablespoons of softened

butterLemon wedges, pickles andchips for servingDirections:

Mix the lobster meat with themayonnaise in a bowl. Add thediced celery and salt and pepperto taste. Cover the bowl withplastic wrap, and chill in the re-frigerator for at least 1 hour.

Preheat a skillet. Spread thesoftened butter on both sides ofeach hot dog roll. Place but-tered side down in the skilletover medium heat, and toast for2 - 3 minutes until light goldenbrown. Flip over, and toast theother side.

Fill each roll with the chilledlobster mixture. Serve immedi-ately with the lemon wedges,potato chips, and pickles.

Drink Stations

Some receptions are featur-ing drink stations for non-alco-holic beverages that may show-case a favorite drink of thecouple and to cut down on thatbar line. It also saves somemoney in the long run whenconsidering your bar tab.

Classic LemonadeServes 4-6Ingredients:1 1/2 cups freshly-squeezedlemon juice (from about 12lemons)1/2 cup evaporated sugar canejuice6 cups waterLemon slices (to garnish)IceDirections:

In a small saucepan, combinetwo cups of the water with thesugar and heat on low, stirring

until the sugar dissolves. Thiswill prevent the crunchy sugarcrystals in the bottom of yourglass and will distribute thesugar evenly throughout thelemonade.

In a large pitcher, combinethe lemon juice, remaining wa-ter, and sugar mixture. Stir untilmixed.

Add plenty of ice and lemonslices. Serve immediately.

The Great Gatsby

This theme is popping up inweddings all over. Take your

guests back to the RoaringTwenties with this champagnecocktail.

Champagne CocktailServes 4Ingredients:4 sugar cubesAngostura bittersChampagneLemon or orange twist, forgarnish

Soak the sugar cubes in An-gostura bitters and drop into achampagne flute. Top with highquality champagne or asparkling wine. Garnish with alemon or orange twist.

The Fake CakeFor a long while, cupcakes

were all the rage, as it was eas-ier to keep them moist and offera variety to the guests. Theywere also much less expensive

than tiered cakes that could costup to several thousand dollars,depending on how intricate thedesign. Now couples can rent abeautifully-decorated cake thathas a compartment in the backfor the “cutting” and have a va-riety of sheet cakes in thekitchen to cut up and serve toguests.

Classic White SheetCakeServes 10-12Ingredients:1 box organic white (orvanilla) cake mix1 cup evaporated sugar canejuice 1 cup + 2 tablespoons cakeflour 1/8 teaspoon sea salt 1 1/3 cups water 3 eggs 1/2 cup melted butter 1 cup sour cream 1 teaspoon vanilla extractDirections:

Preheat the oven to 325 de-grees F. Grease and flour a 13 x9 inch cake pan.

In a large bowl, put water,vanilla extract, eggs, melted but-ter and sour cream. Mix wellwith a mixer.

Add cake mix, sugar, cakeflour, and salt.

Mix at medium speed for ap-proximately 2 minutes, or untilmost lumps are gone.

Pour into prepared pan andbake until a toothpick insertedinto the center comes out clean.

Cool for 7-10 minutes in panthen turn out onto cooling rack.Cool completely before icing.

IcingIngredients:2 cups lightly salted butter,room temperature2 tablespoons meringue

Continued on page 11


TNH Staff

If you are Greek-Americanand you’ve never seen the filmMy Big, Fat Greek Wedding, youare probably the only one. Inwhich case we advise you to putdown this article, go watch thatmovie, and then return and fin-ish reading. If you are like mostGreeks, however, not only haveyou seen that flick, but you canprobably quote most of the dia-log verbatim.

My Big, Fat Greek Wedding,though, transcends ethnic ap-peal, and is the highest-grossingromantic comedy in history. TheInternational Movie Database(IMDb) ranks it #4 in its mostromantic wedding movies of alltime. Before we reveal whichthree movies IMDb ranks higher,keep in mind the categoryname: “Most Romantic WeddingMovies.” It doesn’t mean mostromantic movies, period; theymust involve a wedding. It alsodoesn’t necessarily mean bestmovies of all time, just most ro-mantic. Nonetheless, there isunderstandable overlap amongall three categories.

Here they are, in reverse or-der, IMDb’s top 20:#20: The Wedding Date

(2005)This film stars Debra Messing

as a woman headed back toLondon for her sister’s wedding.Fearing that she will encounterher ex-fiancé, she hires an escortto pretend he is her newboyfriend (played by DermotMulroney.#19: Sweet Home Alabama

(2002)Reese Witherspoon stars as

an Alabaman who moved toNew York and found a greatnew life – great career, greatboyfriend. But when theboyfriend proposes, she needsto take a quick trip back downto Dixieland to compel her hus-

band to sign the divorce papershe continues to ignore. Once shegets down there…(you’ll haveto watch to learn the rest).#18: The Princess Diaries

2: Royal Engagement (2001)A film starring Anne Hath-

away as Princess Mia, who justturned 21 and is in line to be-come Queen of Genovia, exceptfor one little problem: she can’tbe queen unless she finds herselfa husband.#17: Bride Wars (2009)Another Anne Hathaway film

in which she stars as a school-teacher who like her best friend,a lawyer (Kate Hudson) hasplanned her wedding at thePlaza Hotel. But a catering snafuhas both weddings on the sameday, and the BFFs becomecrazed rivals trying to sabotageeach other’s event.#16: Fools Rush In (1997)Matthew Perry stars as a

New Yorker who flies to Vegasand encounters Salma Hayek.One night of passion leads to ababy on the way, an impromptuwedding, and some unexpectedsurprises.#15: Only You (1994)In this Marisa Tomei is de-

termined to find her soul mate,and according to a Ouija board,she has the person’s name. Now,all she has to do is find him.#14: Meet the Parents

(2000)Ben Stiller is a nervous

groom-to-be. But it’s not mar-riage jitters, it’s having to dealwith his overbearing future fa-ther-in-law, played by Robert DeNiro.#13: Four Weddings and a

Funeral (1994)As the title suggests, Hugh

Grant and his friends attend aseries of social events: four wed-dings, and a funeral – and alongthe way, romance strikes.#12: 27 Dresses (2008)Katherine Heigl has been a

bridesmaid 27 times. She is se-cretly in love with her boss, whohas fallen for another woman.Can she win his heart and fi-nally be a bride?#11: American Wedding

(2003)Jason Biggs got his girlfriend

to say “yes” but now he mustplan the wedding, and there aresome zany antics – including abachelor party, of course – alongthe way.#10: Made of Honor

(2008)Patrick Dempsey and

Michelle Monaghan have beenbest buds for years. Now she’sengaged, and asks him to be her“maid” of honor. He agrees, butonly because he wants to stopthe wedding and win her heart.

#9: License to Wed (2007)Mandy Moore wants to get

married in her family churchand her groom-to-be JohnKrasinski is fine with that. Butthe reverend, Robin Williams, isgoing to put them through a fewgrueling weeks to see if they de-serve to be married in hischurch.#8: The In-Laws (2003 –

Remake)The children of Albert Brooks

and Michael Douglas are gettingmarried. But mild-mannered po-diatrist Brooks has no clue

what’s in store for him as CIAoperative Douglas’ dangerousjob follows him to the wedding.#7: Monsoon Wedding

(2001)A traditional four-day wed-

ding in India, with attendeestraveling from all over the worldto get there. But it’s in the mid-dle of monsoon season.#6: Father of the Bride

(1991 – Remake)Steve Martin, the father of

the bride, is having difficultiesreconciling that his little girl isall grown up and about to walk

down the aisle.#5: Honeymoon in Vegas

(1992)Mother issues, commitment

issues, and an intriguing way topay off a gambling debt finallygive Nicholas Cage the clarityhe needs to pursue the womanof his dreams.#4: My Big, Fat Greek Wed-

ding (2002)If you really need a plot sum-

mary, please go back to this ar-ticle’s first paragraph. And now,for the three movies that rankedhigher…#3: The Princess Bride

(1987)A grandfather reads his

grandson a fairy tale that comesto life.#2: Runaway Bride (1989)Richard Gere is a columnist

who wrote a scathing pieceabout Julia Roberts, calling hera “runaway bride.” She has himfired, and he learns she is en-gaged yet again. He tracks herdown and…(once again, you’llhave to watch it to find out).#1: My Best Friend’s Wed-

ding (1997)Julia Roberts again, and Del-

mot Mulroney, too. They’re bestbuddies who made a pact to getmarried, but she doesn’t wantto. Only she founds out he’smarrying Cameron Diaz, and allof a sudden, she wants him.

Like virtually any rankings,you’re bound to disagree withthe order (we sure do!). You’lleven fume about why one ofyour favorites didn’t make thetop 20 instead of some that did.And that’s the fun of lists. But ifyou haven’t seen them all, keepthis list handy, and turn to itnext time it’s movie night.

TNH Staff

In case you haven’t figuredout your wedding music yet,we’ve assembled a few ideashere from which you canchoose:

FIRST DANCEThere is, of course, that all-

important first dance. “Yoursong.” And if you’re one ofthose couples who say: “but wedon’t have a song,” don’t worry– you’re like most. Most couplesdo not have a song any morethan they have a color, a flavor,a motto, a flower, or a bird. So,you’re in good company.

Here are a few good onesfrom which to choose – thenagain, you may have thought ofsomething you like even more.But even if you don’t choose oneof these as your “first dance,”there’s no reason why you – andyour guests – can’t dance thenight away with more of theselater on.

At Last (Etta James)Earth Angel (The Penguins)Endless Love (Lionel Richie

& Diana Ross)Fascination (Nat King Cole)Faithfully (Journey)Grow Old along with Me

(Mary Chapin Carpenter)Have I Told You Lately (Van

Morrison)I Can’t Help Falling in Love

with You (Elvis Presley)If (Bread)I Will (Beatles)Just the Way You Are (Billy

Joel)Open Arms (Journey)Our Love is Here to Stay (Bil-

lie Holiday)Stand by Me (Ben E. King)Tonight I Celebrate My Love

(Peabo Bryson & Roberta Flack)Unchained Melody (Right-

eous Brothers)Unforgettable (Nat King

Cole)Up Where We Belong (Joe

Cocker & Jennifer Warnes)Wonderful Tonight (Eric

Clapton)You Send Me (Sam Cooke)

BRIDE-DAD/GROOM-MOMYou can’t go wrong with a

bride and her dad dancing to“Daddy’s Little Girl,” and thegroom and his mom to “SunriseSunset,” but what about havingboth of those couples on thedance floor at the same time?Some good choices for that for-mat would be “Through theYears” by Kenny Rogers, LouisArmstrong’s “What a WonderfulWorld,” or Bette Midler’s “Windbeneath My Wings.”

OPA!Of course, we can’t forget the

Greek dancing, beginning withthe traditional opening kalama-

tiano, “Oraia Pou Ine I Nifi Mas– How Beautiful Our Bride Is.”Typically, that will lead intothree or four other kalamatiananumbers to make a seven oreight-minute medley.

Besides the kalamatiana,don’t forget about the syrta. Asyrto is a Greek island dance –usually an ode to the sun andthe sea, and though some peopledance them like a kalamatiano,the syrto is a distinct dance best-suited for those songs.

Your hardcore guests will rel-ish their expressive tsamiko, soyou should have at least one ofthose, usually followed byeveryone’s favorite, the one-two-three-kick hasaposerviko.

Finally, nothing says togeth-erness like the criss-cross-armedsousta – as the night turns intothe wee hours of the morning,this one gets more and morepopular.

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By Anthe Mitrakos

Greeks love a traditional wedding. Family, friends, music, dance,food, wine, and sweets come together in celebration of a GreekOrthodox marriage. And what are some basic customs that make aGreek wedding so special? Here are a few:

1. The Stefana: These are wedding crowns the priest places onthe heads of the bride and groom while chanting a verse fromPsalm 8. An ancient tradition, the stefana represent victory andsymbolize a reward for faithfulness to God. During a wedding cer-emony, they are exchanged between the bride and groom’s headthree times, representing the personal sacrifices each will have tomake for the sake of peace and happiness in a life together as acouple.

2. The Martyrika: These are witness pins distributed after wed-ding (and baptism) ceremonies to all guests in attendance atchurch. Martyrika are small lapel ribbons usually decorated with across and sometimes personalized with the couple’s names andwedding date.

3. The Bride’s Shoes: Before the bride takes her walk downthe aisle at church, it is customary for her closest unmarried friendsand family members to jot their names down on the sole of hershoe! At the end of the night (after much dancing around), thebride reveals the names that have worn off and those that remain.Depending on what the girls have decided on beforehand, eitherthe first name to wear off or the last remaining will indicate thelucky girl who will get married next.

4. The Koufeta: No Greek wedding is complete without thesehard sugar coated almonds! Koufeta are placed on the weddingtray along with the wedding stefana. The sweetness of the koufetais meant to symbolize the sweetness of a life together. After thewedding ceremony, the koufeta are served in odd numbers to thosein attendance in a boubouniera. The odd number mix representsthe indivisibility of the bride and groom as a couple. After thewedding, it’s a longstanding tradition for single women to place akoufeto underneath their pillow when they sleep. It is said thatthat night, they will see the man they are destined to marry intheir dreams!

5. The Lambades: These are candles, symbolizing the light ofChrist, used during the wedding ceremony. Two large lambadesare placed by the altar table, while two smaller ones are carried bythe newlyweds toward the end of their wedding ceremony whenthe priest leads the couple around the table three times. This circleis meant to represent eternal marriage.

6. The Boubouniera: These are favors (also offered at baptisms,bridal showers, and engagements). The boubouniera is a traditionwith both Greek and Italian roots that’s meant to serve as a gift towedding guests. Though nowadays there are more creative options,the typical boubouniera usually consists of five or seven tulle-wrapped koufeta attached to some sort of trinket or keepsake.

7. The Stefanothiki: This is a box that wedding stefana areplaced in for safe keeping after the wedding services. The box usu-ally also contains an icon of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Many couplestraditionally display their stefana and stefanothiki in their bedroomsor at the entrance of their homes.


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TNH Staff

Below is the Greek OrthodoxLiturgy, in English, of the Be-trothal and the Crowning whichcomprise a traditional marriageceremony in the church.

PART 1: BETROTHAL

The priest stands before theRoyal Doors, looking towardsthe two who are to be Be-trothed; and they stand outsidethe Royal Doors, the man to theright, and the woman on the left.On the right side of the Holy Al-tar are placed the two rings. Thepriest takes up the censer andcenses the holy icons, the bridalpair, and the people.

Then the priest asks the brideis she wishes to marry thegroom, and the groom if hewishes to marry the bride. Thepriest then says:

Priest: Blessed is our God al-ways, both now and ever, andto the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: In peace let us pray to

the Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.Priest: For the peace from

above; for the salvation of oursouls; let us pray to the Lord.

For the peace of the wholeworld; for the stability of theholy Churches of God; and forthe union of all; let us pray tothe Lord.

For this holy House, and forthem that with faith, reverence,and the fear of God entertherein; let us pray to the Lord.

For our Most Reverend Arch-bishop (Name), for the venera-ble Priesthood, the Diaconate inChrist; for all the Clergy; and forall the people; let us pray to theLord.

For the servant of God(Name) and the servant of God(Name) who now pledge them-selves to one another, and fortheir salvation; let us pray to theLord.

That there may be promisedunto them children for the con-tinuation of their race, grantingunto them all their prayers untosalvation; let us pray to the Lord.

That He send down uponthem love perfect and peaceful,and give them His protection;let us pray to the Lord.

That He may keep them inoneness of mind, and in stead-fastness of the Faith; let us prayto the Lord.

That He may bless them inharmony and perfect trust; letus pray to the Lord.

That He may keep the courseand manner of their life blame-less; let us pray to the Lord.

That the Lord God may grantunto them an honorable mar-riage and a bed undefiled; let uspray to the Lord.

That we may be deliveredfrom all tribulation, wrath, dan-ger and necessity; let us pray tothe Lord.

Help us; save us; have mercyon us and keep us, O God, byYour Grace.

Calling to remembrance ourall-holy, immaculate, exceed-ingly blessed glorious LadyTheotokos and Ever; VirginMary, with all the Saints, let uscommend ourselves and one an-other and all our life to Christour God.

Choir: To You, O God.Priest: (aloud) For to You are

due all Glory, honor, and wor-ship, to the Father, and to theSon, and to the Holy Spirit, bothnow and ever, and to the agesof ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Let us pray to the

Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.Priest: (aloud) O God eternal,

Who has brought together intounity the things which beforehad been separate, and in so do-

ing impose on them an indissol-uble bond of love, Who did blessIsaac and Rebecca, declaringthem to be the inheritors of Yourpromise: do You Yourself (+)bless these Your servants(Name) and (Name), directingthem into every good work.

For You are a merciful andloving God, and to You do wesend up all Glory: to the Father,and to the Son, and to the HolySpirit, both now and ever, andto the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Peace be to all. Choir: And to your spirit.Priest: Let us bow our heads

before the Lord.Choir: To You, O Lord.Priest: O Lord our God, Who

espoused the Church as a purevirgin called from out of theGentiles, bless this Betrothal,uniting these Your servants,keeping them in peace and one-ness of mind.

For to You are due all Glory,honor, and worship: to the Fa-ther, and to the Son, and to theHoly Spirit, both now and ever,and to the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.Then the Priest takes the

rings, blesses them, makes withthem the Sign of the Cross overthe man's head, and says:

The servant of God (Name)is betrothed to the servant ofGod (Name), in the Name of theFather, and of the Son, and ofthe Holy Spirit. (Thrice) Amen.

Then with the rings the Priestmakes the Sign of the Cross overthe woman's head, saying:

The servant of God (Name)is betrothed to the servant ofGod (Name), in the Name of theFather, and of the Son, and ofthe Holy Spirit. (Thrice) Amen.

At the third time, the Priestputs the woman's ring on theman's right finger, and the man's

ring on the woman's right fin-ger.

Then the Groomsman ex-changes the rings thrice.

Priest: Let us pray to theLord.

Choir: Lord have mercy.Priest: O Lord our God, Who

accompanied the servant of thepatriarch Abraham toMesopotamia, when he was sentto espouse a wife for his lordIsaac, and did reveal to him asign by the drawing of water tobetroth Rebecca; do You Yourselfbless the betrothal of these Yourservants (Name) and (Name)and confirm the word that hasbeen spoken by them; for You,O Lord, from the beginning havecreated male and female, and byYou is a woman joined to a manfor assistance and for the con-tinuation of the human race.

Therefore, O Lord God, Whohave sent forth Your truth toYour inheritance and Yourpromise to Your servants, our fa-thers, who were Your elect, doYou give regard unto this Yourservant (Name) and Your ser-

vant (Name), and seal their be-trothal in faith, in oneness ofmind, in truth and in love. ForYou, O Lord, have declared thata pledge is to be given and heldinviolate in all things. By a ringJoseph was given might inEgypt; by a ring Daniel was ex-alted in Babylon; by a ring thetruth of Thamar was made man-ifest; by a ring our heavenly Fa-ther showed compassion uponHis prodigal son, for He said,"Put a ring upon his right hand,kill the fatted calf, and let us eatand rejoice."

Your own right hand, O Lord,armed Moses in the Red Sea.Yea, by the word of Your truthwere the Heavens establishedand the earth set upon her surefoundations; and the right handsof Your servants shall be blessed

by Your mighty word, and byYour uplifted arm. Wherefore, OSovereign Lord, do You Yourselfbless this putting on of ringswith Your heavenly benediction;and may Your Angel go beforethem all the days of their life,for You are He that blesses andsanctifies all things, and to Youdo we send up Glory: to the Fa-ther, and to the Son, and to theHoly Spirit, both now and ever,and to the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.

PART 2: CROWNING AND MARRIAGE

If the Coronation follows theBetrothal immediately, then af-ter the "Amen" of the Ekphonesis("For You are He that blesses andsanctifies ..."), the Priest censesin front of the Altar, and goesout and censes the Ikonostasion.The Processional Psalm is thensung.

THE PROCESSIONAL PSALMPriest (P): Blessed is every-

one that fears the Lord.

The Choir sings after eachstikhos:

Glory to You, O our God,Glory to You.

P: That walks in His ways,Glory to You, O our God,

Glory to You.P: For you shall eat the labor

of your hands.Glory to You, O our God,

Glory to You.P: Blessed are you, and it

shall be well with you.Glory to You, O our God,

Glory to You.P: Your wife shall be as a

fruitful vine on the sides of yourhouse.


P: Your children like youngolive plants around your table.

Glory to You, O our God,

Glory to You.P: Behold! The man shall be

blessed that fears the Lord.Glory to You, O our God,

Glory to You.P: The Lord shall bless you

out of Zion, and you shall seethe good things of Jerusalem allthe days of your life.


P: Yea! You shall see yourchildren's children, and peace beupon Israel.


Turning towards the East andraising the Holy Gospel, thePriest says:

Blessed is the Kingdom of theFather, and of the Son, and ofthe Holy Spirit, both now andever, and to the ages of ages.

Choir:Amen.During the Easter season

"Christ is risen" is sung thrice.The Priest says the Synapte, andthe Choir responds to each peti-tion by singing "Lord havemercy.

Priest: In peace let us pray tothe Lord.

For the peace from above; forthe salvation of our souls; let uspray to the Lord.

For the peace of the wholeworld; for the stability of theholy Churches of God; and forthe union of all; let us pray tothe Lord.

For this holy House; and forthem that with faith, reverence,and the fear of God entertherein; let us pray to the Lord.

For our Most Reverend Arch-bishop (Name), for the venera-ble Priesthood, the Diaconate inChrist; for all the Clergy; and forall the people; let us pray to theLord.

For the servants of God(Name) and (Name), who arenow being joined to one anotherin the community of Marriage,and for their salvation; let uspray to the Lord.

That this marriage may beblessed as was that of Cana ofGalilee; let us pray to the Lord.

That there may be given untothem soberness of life, and fruitof the womb as may be most ex-pedient for them; let us pray tothe Lord.

That they may rejoice in thebeholding of sons and daugh-ters; let us pray to the Lord.

That there may be grantedunto them the happiness ofabundant fertility, and a courseof life blameless andunashamed; let us pray to theLord.

That there may be grantedunto them and unto us allprayers that tend unto salvation;let us pray to the Lord

That both they and we maybe delivered from tribulation,wrath, danger, and necessity; letus pray to the Lord.

Help us; save us; have mercyon us and keep us, O God byYour Grace.

Calling to remembrance ourall�holy, immaculate, exceed-ingly blessed glorious LadyTheotokos and Ever�VirginMary, with all the Saints; let uscommend ourselves and one an-other and all our life to Christour God.

Choir: To You, O God.Priest: For to You are due all

Glory, honor, and worship: to theFather, and to the Son, and tothe Holy Spirit, both now andever and to the ages of ages.


Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.And the Priest says aloud the

following: O God most pure, Au-thor of all creation, Whothrough Your man-befriendinglove transformed a rib of Adamthe forefather into a woman,and blessed them and said, "In-crease and multiply, and have

dominion over the earth," and,by the conjoining, declared themboth to be one member, for be-cause of this a man shall forsakehis father and his mother, andshall cleave unto his wife, andthe two shall be one flesh�andwhom God has joined togetherlet not man put asunder;

Who did also bless Your ser-vant Abraham, and opened thewomb of Sara, and made himthe father of many nations; Whobestowed Isaac upon Rebecca,and blessed her offspring; Whojoined Jacob and Rachel, andfrom them made manifest thetwelve patriarchs; Who yokedJoseph and Asenath together,and as the fruit of generationdid bestow upon them Ephremand Manasse; Who acceptedZacharias and Elizabeth, and de-clared their offspring the Fore-runner;

Who out of the root of Jesse,according to the flesh, producedthe Ever�Virgin Mary, and fromher were Incarnate-born for thesalvation of the human race;Who through Your unspeakableGrace and plentiful goodnesswere present in Cana of Galilee,and blessed the marriage there,that You might show a lawfulunion, and a generation therefrom, is according to Your Will;do You Yourself, O Most HolyMaster, accept the prayer of us,Your servants; and as You werepresent there, be present alsohere with Your invisible protec-tion.

Bless this marriage and grantunto these Your servants (Name)and (Name) a peaceful life,length of days, chastity, love forone another in a bond of peace,offspring long�lived, fair fameby reason of their children, anda crown of glory that does notfade away.

Account them worthy to seetheir children's children. Keeptheir wedlock safe against everyhostile scheme; give them of thedew from the Heavens above,and of the fatness of the earth.Fill their houses with bountifulfood, and with every good thing,that they may have to give tothem that are in need, bestowingalso on them that are here as-sembled with us all their suppli-cations that are unto salvation.

For a God of mercy and ofcompassion, and of manbe-friending love are You, and toYou do we send up Glory: as toYour eternal Father and YourAll�Holy, Good, and Life�creat-ing Spirit, both now and ever,and to the ages of ages.


Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.The Priest says aloud the fol-

lowing:

PRAYERBlessed are You, O Lord our

God, Holy Celebrant of mysticaland pure marriage, Maker of thelaws that govern earthly bodies,Guardian of incorruption, Kindlyprotector of the means of life:do You Yourself now, O Master,Who in the beginning createdman, and appointed him as theking of creation, and said, "It isnot good for man to be aloneupon the earth; let us make ahelpmate for him�" then, takingone of his ribs, made woman,whom when Adam saw, he said,"This is now bone of my bones,and flesh of my flesh, for shewas taken out of her man.

For this cause shall a man for-sake his father and his mother,and cleave unto his wife, andtwo shall be one flesh�" and"whom God has joined together,let no man put asunder." Andnow, O Master, Lord our God,send down Your heavenly Graceupon these Your servants,(Name) and (Name), and grantunto this woman to be in all

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things subject unto the man, andto this Your servant to be at thehead of the woman that they liveaccording to Your Will.

Bless them. O Lord our God,as you blessed Abraham andSara. Bless them, O Lord ourGod, as You blessed Isaac andRebecca. Bless them, O Lord ourGod, as you blessed Jacob andall the Prophets. Bless them, OLord our God, as You blessedJoseph and Asenath. Bless themO Lord our God, as You blessedMoses and Zipporah Bless them,O Lord our God, as You blessedJoakim and Anna. Bless them,O Lord our God, as You blessedZacharias and Elizabeth. Pre-serve them, O Lord our God, asYou preserved Noah in the Ark.

Preserve them, O Lord ourGod, as You preserved Jonah inthe jaw of the sea beast. Preservethem, O Lord our God, as Youpreserved the holy Three Chil-dren from the fire, when Yousent down upon them the dewof the Heavens. And may thatjoy come upon them which theblessed Helen had when shefound the Precious Cross. Re-member them, O Lord our God,as You remembered Enoch,Shem, and Elias.

Remember them, O Lord ourGod, as You remembered Yourholy Forty Martyrs, sendingdown upon them the crownsfrom the Heavens. Rememberthem, O Lord our God, and theparents who have reared them,for the prayers of parents con-firm the foundation of houses.Remember, O Lord our God, thewedding company that herehave come together, to be pre-sent at this rejoicing.

Remember, O Lord our God,Your servant (Name) and Yourservant (Name), and bless them.Give to them fruit of the womb,fair children, concord of souland body. Exalt them as thecedars of Lebanon, and aswell�cultured vine; bestow onthem a rich store of sustenance,so that having a sufficiency ofall things for themselves, theymay abound in every good workthat is good and acceptable be-fore You. Let them behold theirchildren's children as newlyplanted olive trees round abouttheir table; and, being acceptedbefore You, let them shine asstars in the Heavens, in You, ourLord, to Whom are due all Glory,honor, and worship as to Youreternal Father, and YourAll�Holy, Good, and Life�creat-ing Spirit, both now and ever,and to the ages of ages.


Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.And the Priest says aloud the

following: Holy God, Who fash-ioned man from the dust, andfrom his rib fashioned woman,and joined her to him as a help-mate for him, for it was seemlyunto Your Majesty for man notto be alone upon the earth, doYou Yourself, O Sovereign Lord,stretch forth Your hand fromYour holy dwelling place, andjoin* together this Your servant(Name) and Your servant(Name), for by You is a wifejoined to her husband. Jointhem together in oneness ofmind; crown them with wedlockinto one flesh; grant to them thefruit of the womb, and the gainof well-favored children, forYours is the dominion, and Yoursis the Kingdom, and the Power,and the Glory: of the Father, andof the Son, and of the HolySpirit, both now and ever, andto the ages of ages.

*When this is said, the priestjoins their right hands.

Choir: Amen.After the Amen, the Priest,

taking up the Crowns, crownsfirst the Bridegroom, saying:

The servant of God (Name)is crowned for the servant ofGod, (Name), in the Name ofthe Father, and of the Son, andof the Holy Spirit. Amen.(Thrice)

And he crowns the Bride, say-ing: The servant of God (Name)is crowned for the servant ofGod (Name), in the Name of theFather, and of the Son, and ofthe Holy Spirit. Amen. (Thrice)

The Priest takes the Crownof the Groom in his right hand,and the Crown of the Bride inhis left, and places them on theirheads while he intones: O Lord,our God, crown them with gloryand honor.

THE EPISTLEPriest: Let us attend.Reader: Prokeimenon, in

Tone 8You have set upon their heads

crowns of precious stones. Theyasked life of You, and You gaveit to them.

Priest: Wisdom!Reader: The Reading from

the Epistle of the holy ApostlePaul to the Ephesians. (5:20�33)

Priest: Let us attend.Reader: Brethren, give thanks

always for all things in the nameof our Lord Jesus Christ to Godthe Father. Be subject to one an-other out of reverence for Christ.Wives, be subject to your hus-bands, as to the Lord. For thehusband is the head of the wifeas Christ is the head of thechurch, his body, and is himselfits Savior.

As the church is subject to

Christ, so let wives be also sub-ject in everything to their hus-bands. Husbands, love yourwives, as Christ loved the churchand gave himself up for her, thathe might sanctify her, havingcleansed her by the washing ofwater with the word, that hemight present the church to him-self in splendor, without spot orwrinkle or any such thing, thatshe might be holy and withoutblemish.

Even so husbands should lovetheir wives as their own bodies.He who loves his wife loves him-self For no man ever hates hisown flesh, but nourishes andcherishes it, as Christ does thechurch, because we are mem-bers of his body. "For this reasona man shall leave his father andhis mother and shall be joinedto his wife, and the two shall be-come one." This is a great mys-tery, and I take it to mean Christand the church; however, leteach one of you love his wife ashimself, and let the wife see thatshe respects her husband.

Priest: Peace be to you whoread.

Reader: And with your spirit.Choir: Alleluia, alleluia, al-

leluia.O Lord, You shall keep us and

You shall preserve us from thisgeneration forth and forever.

THE HOLY GOSPELPriest: Wisdom! Let us at-

tend! Let us hear the HolyGospel.

Peace be to all. Choir: And to your spirit.Priest: The Reading from the

Holy Gospel according to St.John. (John 2: 1 �11)

Choir: Glory to You, O Lord,Glory to You.

Priest: At that time there wasa marriage at Cana in Galilee,and the mother of Jesus wasthere; Jesus also was invited tothe marriage, with his disciples.When the wine failed, themother of Jesus said to him,"They have no wine." And Jesussaid to her, "O woman, whathave you to do with me? Myhour has not yet come." Hismother said to the servants, "Dowhatever he tells you." Now sixstone jars were standing there,for the Jewish rites of purifica-tion, each holding twenty orthirty gallons. Jesus said tothem, "Fill the jars with water."

And they filled them up to thebrim. He said to them, "Nowdraw some out, and take it tothe steward of the feast." So theytook it. When the steward of thefeast tasted the water now be-come wine, and did not knowwhere it came from (though theservants who had drawn the wa-ter knew), the steward of thefeast called the bridegroom andsaid to him, "Every man servesthe good wine first; and whenmen have drunk freely, then thepoor wine; but you have keptthe good wine until now." This,the first of his signs, Jesus did atCana in Galilee, and manifestedhis glory; and his disciples be-lieved in him.

Choir: Glory to You, O Lord,Glory to You.

The Priest gives the Book ofthe Gospels to the Bride and theGroom to be kissed, and thencontinues with the following pe-titions. After each, the Choir re-sponds thrice with "Lord havemercy."

Let us say with all our souland all our mind, let us say:

O Lord Almighty, God of ourfathers, we pray You, listen andhave mercy.

Have mercy on us, O God, ac-cording to Your great mercy; wepray You, listen and have mercy.

Again let us pray for the ser-vants of God, (Name) and

(Name), that they may havemercy, life, health, peace, safety,salvation, pardon and remissionof their sins.

Priest: For You are a mercifuland loving God, and to You dowe send up Glory: to the Father,and to the Son, and to the HolySpirit, both now and ever, andto the ages of ages.


Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.Priest (facing the married

couple): O Lord our God, Whoin Your saving Providence didpromise in Cana of Galilee to de-clare marriage honorable byYour presence, do You Yourselfpreserve in peace and onenessof mind these Your servants(Name) and (Name), whom Youare well pleased should bejoined to one another. Declaretheir marriage honorable. Pre-serve their bed undefiled. Grantthat their life together be withbe without spot of sin. And as-sure that they may be worthy toattain unto a ripe old age, keep-ing Your commandments in apure heart.

For You are our God, the Godto have mercy and save, and toYou do we send up all Glory, asto Your Eternal Father, and YourAll�Holy, Good, and Life�creat-ing Spirit, both now and ever,and to the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Help us; save us; have

mercy on us, and keep Us, OGod, by Your Grace.

Choir: Lord have mercy.Priest: That the whole day

may be kept perfect, holy, peace-ful, and sinless; let us ask of theLord.

Choir responds to each peti-tion saying: O Lord, grant thisprayer.

An Angel of Peace, a faithfulGuide, a Guardian of our soulsand bodies; let us ask of theLord.

Pardon and remission of oursins and offenses; let us ask ofthe Lord.

All things that are good andprofitable for our souls, andpeace for the whole world; letus ask of the Lord.

That we may complete theremaining time of our life inpeace and repentance; let us askof the Lord.

A Christian ending to our life,painless, without shame, peace-ful; and a good defense beforethe dread Judgment Seat ofChrist; let us ask of the Lord.

Asking for the unity of theFaith and the Communion of theHoly Spirit, let us commend our-selves and one another and allour life to Christ our God.

And account us worthy, OSovereign Lord, with boldnessand without condemnation todare call on You, the HeavenlyGod, as Father, and to say:

Choir: Our Father, Who arein Heaven, Hallowed be YourName; Your Kingdom come.

Your Will be done on earthas it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our dailybread;

And forgive us our trespasses,As we forgive those who tres-

pass against usAnd lead us not into tempta-

tion.But deliver us from evil.Priest: For Yours is the King-

dom and the Power and theGlory, of the Father, and of theSon, and of the Holy Spirit, bothnow and ever, and to the agesof ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Peace be to all.Choir: And to your spirit.Priest: Let us bow our heads

before the Lord.Choir: To You, O Lord.Then the common cup is of-

fered.Priest: Let us pray to the

Lord.Choir: Lord have mercy.The Priest blesses the cup

saying this prayer: O God, Whoby Your might create all things,and confirm the universe, andadorn the crown of all thingscreated by You, do You, withYour spiritual blessing, bless alsothis common cup given to themthat are joined in the community


Continued on page 10

By Constantinos E. Scaros

The website of the Greek Or-thodox Archdiocese of Americafeatures a section about Inter-faith marriage (goarch.org).

It features an email by aGreek-Orthodox man engagedto a Jewish woman. He is dis-tressed that the Greek OrthodoxChurch will not marry them andwants to know if Orthodox the-ologians are changing theirways on such a policy.

The response, by Fr CharlesJoannides, begins: “From an Or-thodox perspective, marriage isa lifestyle that facilitates bothpartners' religious and spiritualjourney. It also serves to culti-vate their future children's reli-gious and spiritual develop-ment. For these reasons, forcenturies Orthodox Canon Lawdiscouraged intermarriage ofany type. Moreover, Orthodoxfaithful who chose to intermarryforfeited their sacramental priv-ileges.”

Fr. Joannides goes on to saythat the Church is rethinking itsposition about interfaith mar-riage, but more so about Ortho-dox marrying other Christiansthan non-Christians.

Neither the email nor the re-sponse is dated, but it remainsthe website’s content regarding

the issue of interfaith marriageand so, one would think, re-mains the Archdiocese’s currentposition.

If we begin with the openingof Fr. Joannides’ response, wesee that marriage serves to: 1)facilitate the married couple’sreligious and spiritual journey;and 2) cultivate the children’sreligious and spiritual develop-ment.

All of that sounds wonderful,except for one thing: truthfully,

to what extent does that happenin marriages where both part-ners are Greek Orthodox?

Sure, there is the ritualisticaspect: you’re born and raisedGreek, your parents expect youto get married in a Greekchurch, as do the parents ofyour spouse-to-be, and so yougo through the ritual, followedby rice and photos, and theneat, drink, and dance the nightaway.

Granted, many Orthodoxcouples take their religion veryseriously. They attend Churchregularly while their children at-tend Sunday school one levelbelow. But how many coupleshave a scant if not whollynonexistent religious and spiri-tual journey? How many eitherdo not attend church at all, ormake their once-a-year visit for

the midnight service to celebratethe Resurrection on Holy Satur-day into Easter Sunday?

How many know whatmakes an Orthodox differentfrom a Catholic, an Anglican, ora Methodist? How many Ortho-dox are really passionate thatthe Holy Spirit proceeds fromthe Father, and not from “theFather and the Son?” Do theyeven know about that contro-versy (the Filioque)? Even ifthey knew, would they evencare? Would they say: “yes, webelieve the Holy Spirit proceedsfrom the Father and not also theSon, because…” or would theysay: “which version does ourchurch believe? Because, that’sthey side we’re on”?

Next, let us turn to “religiousand spiritual” which, to itscredit, the Archdiocese distin-guishes as not being one andthe same. Granted, many Ortho-dox, by designation and self-identification, are on the same"religious journey.” They attendthe same type of church, theycelebrate Easter on the sameday, which is often differentfrom Western Easter, etc. But Iwould venture to say no two hu-man beings are on the samespiritual journey, let alone everysingle person filling the pews ofevery single Greek Orthodoxchurch on any given Sunday.

“We believe” is where theArchdiocese gets it wrong. “Webelieve” purports that every sin-

gle member of the Greek Ortho-dox Church believes the samethings about God, Christ, andlife. Considering that so manyOrthodox clergy differ in theirinterpretations – and justifiablyso – of the Bible and of theteachings of the Early Fathers,why would one expect the laityto conform to one way of think-ing, without exercising theirown independent thoughts withtheir own God-given brains?

So, if you’re Greek Orthodoxand so is your spouse-to-be (orare the parents of such a cou-ple), good for you! But if yourintended is of a different faiththan you are, good for you, too!

I don’t know if the personwho sent that email to the Arch-

diocese is reading this, but myreaction is this: hopefully, bynow you have found a Greek Or-thodox priest open enough toaccept that not everyone is go-ing to embrace Greek Ortho-doxy.

That doesn’t mean priestsshould not continue to preachthe Orthodox way, if they trulybelieve that is the best of all re-ligions. But a true representativeof God on earth would neverturn a non-believer away. Andif such a church does such athing, then you’re better offwithout it. After all, just becausea church turns its back on you,doesn’t mean that God does –and that’s what’s most impor-tant of all.


A Frank Conversation about Interfaith Marriage

of marriage.For blessed is Your Holy

Name, and glorified is the King-dom of the Father, and of theSon, and of the Holy Spirit, bothnow and ever, and to the agesof ages.

Choir: Amen.Then the Priest gives them to

drink thrice from the cup, firstto the man, then to the woman,chanting: I will drink from thecup of salvation; I will call uponthe name of the Lord.

Then he takes the Bridal Pair,while the Groomsman holds theCrowns behind and above them,and leads them in a circlearound the Analogion thrice.The people sing:The Dance of Isaiah, in Tone 5

O Isaiah, dance your joy, forthe Virgin was indeed with child;and brought to birth a Son, thatEmmanuel, Who came as bothGod and man;Day�at�the�Dawn is the NameHe bears, and by extolling Him,We hail the Virgin as blessed.

Hear us, you martyred Saints,who fought the good fight, gain-ing crowns: entreat the Lord toshed His tender mercy on oursouls.

Glory to You, O Christ ourGod, Your Apostles' proudestboast and treasure of Your Mar-tyrs' joy, Who to all proclaimedthe Consubstantial Trinity.

Then the Priest removes theCrowns, taking first that of theGroom and saying:

Be magnified, O Bridegroom,as Abraham, and blessed asIsaac, and increased as was Ja-cob. Go your way in peace, per-forming in righteousness thecommandments of God.

He takes the Crown of theBride and says:

And you, O Bride, be magni-fied as was Sarah, and rejoicedas was Rebecca, and increasedas Rachel, being glad in yourhusband, keeping the paths ofthe Law, for so God is wellpleased.

Priest: Let us pray to theLord.

Choir: Lord have mercy.Now the Priest says this

prayer: O God our God, Whowas present in Cana of Galileeand blessed the marriage there,do You (+) also bless these' Yourservants, who, by Your Provi-dence, are joined in the commu-nity of marriage. Bless theircomings�in and theirgoings�out. Replenish their lifewith all good things. (Here thepriest lifts the crowns from theheads of the bride and groomand places them on the table.)Accept their crowns in Your

Kingdom unsoiled and unde-filed; and preserve them withoutoffense to the ages of ages.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Peace be to all.Choir: And to your spirit.Priest: Let us bow our heads

before the Lord.Choir: To You, O Lord.Priest: The Father, the Son,

and the Holy Spirit; the All�Holy,Consubstantial and Life�creatingTrinity; One Godhead and King-dom; bless (+) you; grant to youlong life, well-favored children,progress in life and in Faith; re-plenish you with all the goodthings of the earth, and countyou worthy of the promisedblessings, through the interces-sions of the holy Theotokos, andof all the Saints.

Choir: Amen.Priest: Glory to You, O Christ

our God and our hope: glory to

You.Reader: Glory to the Father

and to the Son and to the HolySpirit, both now and ever, andto the ages of ages. Amen.

Lord have mercy; Lord havemercy; Lord have mercy. HolyFather, Bless.

Priest: He, Who by His pres-ence in Cana of Galilee declaredmarriage to be honorable, Christour true God, through the inter-cessions of His all�pure Mother,of the holy, glorious, andall�praiseworthy Apostles, of theholy, God�crowned andEqual�to�the�Apostles Constan-tine and Helen, and of all the holySaints, have mercy on us and saveus, as our good and loving Lord.

Through the prayers of ourholy Fathers, Lord Jesus ChristOur God, Have Mercy on us andsave us.

Choir: Amen.

The Greek Orthodox Wedding Ceremony

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Making Your Wedding a Dream

By Constantinos E. Scaros

Weddings are wonderful, fu-nerals are sad. We look forwardto one and dread the other. Andwhat do they have in common?In our time of euphoric bliss ortearful sorrow, there are thosewho exploit the extremities ofour emotions – often overcharg-ing us for no good reason be-sides greed – realizing that inour moment of vulnerability weare not really in much of a posi-tion to negotiate. Well, let’sleave funerals aside, and con-centrate on weddings.

Here are some key tips abouthow to make your special dayas wonderful and as memorableas possible, without falling vic-tim to ridiculously exorbitantcosts – money that you can putto much better use as you beginlife as husband and wife.

If money is no object, thenlucky you! But if you’re likemost people, you want a have agreat day without breaking thebank.

FLEXIBILITYWhen planning your “big,

fat, Greek wedding,” flexibilityis key – and I don’t mean beinglimber enough to lead the open-ing kalamatiano (although that’simportant, too!). Avoid an “I ab-solutely want this” for any part

of your wedding. Instead, re-place it with the almost-as-in-dispensable “I really, really wantthis,” because at least, there isroom for Plan B.

Do you absolutely need a live

band? They’re more expensivethan a DJ who, in turn, is moreexpensive than some good qual-ity prerecorded music. You canhave fun with all three!

How about arriving at church

in a horse-drawn carriage?Classy, eh? Yes, but if it costsmore than your honeymoon –or new house – do away with it.Believe, me, once you’re at thealtar, you’ll be so excited aboutthat, and so the last thing onyour mind will be by whatmeans of transportation you gotthere.

What about an array of sushifor your cocktail hour? Notavailable? No problem. You andyour guests will get to eat sushiagain soon enough – you won’tmiss it for one afternoon.

We could go on and on withexamples, but the point is – themore flexible you are, the lesslikely you are to be disap-pointed, or raked over the coalsto fork over more bucks thanyou care to spend. And perhapseven more importantly the lessyou are fixated on specifics, theeasier it is for you to say: “I’lljust take my business else-where.”

PRIORITIES AND DISTANCE

The wedding is all about thebride and the groom (unlesssomeone else is paying for it –then all bets are off). Itshouldn’t be about UncleStavros wanting to smoke acigar in the middle of the ball-room, or Cousin Amalia insist-ing on dancing the Electric Slideand the Macarena.

If your wedding reception isat Terrace on the Park in Flush-ing and your guests have totravel “all the way” from Hemp-stead, too bad – it’s not whatqualifies as “long distance.” Ifthey’re not happy with youragenda, so be it.

But if you met your sweet-heart at Freshman Orientationon the main campus of the Uni-versity of Montana in Missoula,and you think it would be totallyromantic to have your weddingreception there, then you’d bet-ter cater to the whims of thosepoor, tortured friends and rela-tives you’re forcing to travelcross country to be there! Thatmeans, plenty of good, expen-sive food, and a very well-stocked, top-shelf open bar!

NO HARD FEELINGSAll of the above notwith-

standing, the last thing youwant is – pardon the touchy-feely cliché, “bad juju.” Just likethe most asinine thing in theworld to do is have a bad rela-tionship with your tenant (orlandlord) while living in thesame two-family house, youshould avoid, at all costs, astrained situation over unre-solved issues, just because youcouldn’t settle on a per-drinkprice past 1AM. At the end ofthe day you need to figure itout, let it go, and be happy withyour hosts.

Oh, and that’s all about thereception hall. If your churchhappens to rake you over thecoals, and you feel completelymortified that sacraments arefor sale – let that go, too. Justnegotiate things as far as theycan go – and then just walkaway and smell the roses (orwhatever your wedding’s flowerarrangement is). Have a greatday – and you can always letthe world know how greedyeveryone was after you get backfrom your honeymoon – if youeven care at that point.


RECOLLECTIONS OF A GROOM

Wedding Costs: Stick to YourGuns, but No Hard Feelings

powder2 teaspoons pure vanillaextract1/4 teaspoon lemon extract1/4 teaspoon orange extract8 cups powdered sugar4-6 tablespoons water1/4 teaspoons sea saltDirections:

Measure water, put in smallcup and add salt. Stir to dis-solve.

In large bowl (standingmixer recommended), mix but-ter and meringue powder andall flavorings and extracts. Mixon low to combine.

Add powdered sugar gradu-ally, still mixing on low.

Gradually add salted waterand mix on low for 1-2 minutesuntil well combined, scrapingpaddle and sides of bowl as nec-essary. For thicker icing, add lesswater. Ice cake.

Late Night Snack

As if the wedding feast at thereception wasn’t enough, somecaterers are offering a late nightsnack after hours of dancing toset themselves apart from othercaterers. It’s a low cost additionto the package and gives thecustomer more bang for theirbuck.

Classic Chocolate ChipCookiesMakes 4 dozen cookiesIngredients:2 sticks butter, softened atroom temperature2 eggs3/4 cup packed brown sugar3/4 cup evaporated sugar canejuice1 teaspoon vanilla1 teaspoon baking soda1/4 teaspoon salt2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour1 9-oz package chocolate chipsDirections:

Preheat oven to 375 degreesF.

Cream together butter, eggs,sugars and vanilla. Beat untilwell combined and smooth.

Add baking soda, salt andflour. Beat on medium-highspeed until a smooth doughforms.

Add chocolate chips and mixto combine.

Using a small ice creamscoop, scoop dough onto an un-greased cookie sheet.

Bake for 10-12 minutes, ro-tating half way through.

Allow to cool for 5 minuteson the cookie sheet before re-moving. Serve with milk.

WeddingFoodTrends

Continued from page 5


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